My life has changed quite a bit in the last few months. In lots of good ways, and in some less good ways… such as losing momentum with my own rope learning. So I’ve been thinking about ways to learn more, faster.
Lately I’ve been doing a lot of teaching, a lot of writing, a lot of conveying to people the skills and information about rope bondage that I’ve learned over the past four years or so.
And that’s been really fun. There’s something really satisfying about teaching and passing on information, and knowing that I’m helping other people with their learning on their rope journey.
I especially like that moment when something clicks, when the person I’m teaching masters something new. I feel a kind of satisfaction and pride in the student ; they’ve taken in the information, they’ve put in the effort, and it’s paid off. They’ve mastered a new skill.
Sure, I helped – but they’re the ones that did the work. That’s their accomplishment. And that’s just really awesome to see happen. I fucking love watching someone walk away with a glow on their face and a new bit of rope in their hands so they can practice at home.
So all this writing and teaching and productivity has been really cool…
but in some ways it’s also slowed my own growth as a rope artist.
Yes, I’ve been patiently documenting and teaching – and don’t get me wrong, I’ve learned some very cool stuff that way – but I haven’t been practicing new or more advanced skills as much . I haven’t been pushing and advancing my own skills and knowledge to the extent that I’d like.
I’m actually getting a bit rusty on some of the things I meant to make a lot more progress on this year.
So this week I did some thinking and planning about how I can continue to learn and grow as a rope artist while maintaining the blog and my social life.
Step One: Morning Reading and Viewing.
So I work from 8.00 to 4.30 on weekdays. And it is definitely not a job where I can be hanging out on the Internet looking at cool sexy rope videos or tutorials and stuff. So I can’t learn new stuff then.
After work, I’m usually shattered from a day of productivity and managing other people and their various woes. So I can’t learn new stuff then. I don’t have the energy or the attention span.
This leaves me with mornings.
My morning routine now consists of getting up, making breakfast, doing some exercise, and in between/after exercise, sitting at my computer eating breakfast and viewing rope related things on the Internet. I’m hunting inspiration, tutorials, bits and pieces of practical knowledge that I haven’t come across yet (I can also have another go through my Douglas Kent books; he’s got some great tutorials).
For example, this week, I learned
– a useful trick for making sure I know where the middle (bight) of my rope is after I untie someone and there’s rope strewn everywhere. I can add a cool little slipknot to the bight, and then I know exactly where the middle is when I want to reuse that uncoiled piece of rope.
– a very useful suspension tie that can be applied to most parts of the body to good effect (don’t know the name of it, I’m calling it a “basket tie”).
– and I reviewed my understanding of secondary or second column ties.
So far, this is really working.
Step Two: Setting Learning Goals
Randomly wandering around the Internet, picking up bits and pieces of information like a magpie, will only get me so far. I need to have focused goals, e.g. learning more about connecting to partners through tying and bondage, or studying predicament bondage and positions. I haven’t done a huge amount of predicament so far… it’s something I’d like to get better at.
If I have set goals, then I’m learning and studying with a focus, which means my learning will be a hell of a lot more productive.
Step Three: Regular Practice.
It’s important for me to get more rope practice so I can keep developing. And I need to be able to arrange rope practice in such a way that I can also get the socializing in that I need to have a balanced life, and find some time to chill and watch Jessica Jones (Holy god that show is good) as well as continue to find time to write and create tutorials for this blog. I find I can do most of my personal productivity stuff in the weekend; so that’s when I do my blogging; but it’s also the optimal time to practice new things in the most effective manner possible.
So I’ve made a plan to schedule regular practice, on Sundays and the occasional weeknight, with different people, so that I can keep practicing and putting new things into muscle memory. Really amping that rope learning.
At the same time, I don’t want to just practice, I want to do regular actual rope play; because if all I do is practice, I’ll forget what I’m practicing FOR. It’s not just about getting better; it’s getting better so that I can create hotter, more enjoyable interactions with people I enjoy interacting with in that manner. So…
Step Four: Embrace Opportunities.
Play parties, play dates, impromptu scenes… yeah. All those things.
With people who love rope, and who I really enjoy interacting with.
I think this is a pretty great plan… what are your thoughts?
Photo credit goes to http://www.gotcredit.com/
Thrilled to have found your site after becoming intrigued by this! I want to learn to tie people up and I would love to explore being the one getting tied up. I’m grateful for the resources you have here so that I can temper my excitement with realistic expectations and with keeping safety (mine and others) in mind.
You’re welcome Erika, I’m very glad this site is useful for you! It’s always encouraging to get some positive feedback 🙂
I’m actually very curious about your timeline. What is the span of time from your beginnings to now where you feel confident in your craft and able to teach it to others? And I know you mentioned your routine in another post, but how much average daily practice would you say is needed to get to that point (to feel confident in your abilities)?
Erika, that’s a really good question. There’s a few different factors that have gone into that length of time…
From the time I started until now was approximately four years…
And a lot happened in those four years. New jobs, changes in partners and long spaces without partners, changes in my focus.
As a result, periods of learning and practice and play were intermittent, and I lost a lot of progress a few times, and had to make it back up.
That intermittency was the first big factor influencing the length of time learning.
The second is how I learned.
I didn’t have an organized curriculum or a single teacher; I picked up lots of different bits and pieces from a lot of different sources, (books, videos, experimentation) collecting shiny bits of knowledge like a magpie and learning how to apply them, eventually forming my own style which is still evolving.
One of the things I’ve learned through teaching is that with an organized curriculum, and someone to explain the principles of how things work, you can pick the knowledge and skills up a lot faster.
So, let’s say you’ve got a good, organized source of information, that explains the underlying principles and expectations really well. You practice bits and pieces (like single column ties, double column ties, doing the odd harness on a chair or something) about three/four hours a week, before or after work, and you get to do things with an actual human about once a week.
I would say maybe four months to develop the base skills and knowledge, and then if you’re tying someone regularly (twice a week), maybe another four months to develop the experience and confidence.
The two key things would be the well organized source of learning, and then regular practice. The longer you go without that regular practice, the more your motor skills, muscle memory, and confidence degrade, and then you have to relearn. I’ve done that several times.
Oh, and having good, constructive partners is really helpful as well 🙂
Yay! Got my first set of ropes to practice with! If I could post pictures I would do so to show my first few ties.
That’s awesome, way to go Erika! Now that you’ve got rope it’s just a matter of time until you’re having very good fun with it 🙂 Feel free to email some of the pictures if you want to show them off, I’ll throw them into a post for funsies if you like.